Anxious to see you

He was coming for a visit.

She’d loved this boy-man since he came into their lives as an 8-year-old. He’d been trouble waiting to happen but soon grew up into one of her biggest blessings. He had her heart.

And he was coming for a visit.

Anticipation. Worry. Excitement. Anxious thoughts.

Anything could happen. Probably nothing would. But it could.

But he’s 20 years old and invincible. He thinks his “I will” is a promise he can keep.

Then the next text dings.

Note the time of the “help!” text. If all had gone according to plan, he’d be about twenty minutes from home. The family would still be on vacation at the Happiest Place on Earth—but he’d be ready to crawl into bed after his long drive. He’d have visions of excited morning greetings dancing in his head.

But things don’t always go according to plan. Instead, she woke up to someone telling her to check her texts. A horde of thoughts doing battle in her head.

“The worst has happened…”
“At least he can text..”
“I tried to warn him…”
“Thank you, Jesus…”
“What if…”

It wasn’t her worst fear. He was okay. But still.

And now everyone close to him understands a little more that sometimes our fears are realized. This time wasn’t the worst of times, but it was too close for comfort. Being a nervous wreck can end in an actual wreck.

Mary, Did You Know?

You probably heard Mark Lowry and Buddy Greene’s song at least once during the Christmas season. Everyone has recorded it—from Michael English to Pentatonix, Kutless, and Kenny Rogers.

You may love it because it gives you a different perspective on the Nativity story, or because you’re a parent who’s dreamed and worried over a child. You may refuse to listen to it because you have grammatical or theological concerns.

Regardless of how you feel about the song, you have to admit, it does put an eternal exhortation smack dab into the middle of one of our most important faith stories and attach it to the name of one of our most beloved biblical characters.

Mary did know a lot about the future for Jesus. She and Joseph had heard it from the angels, the shepherds, Anna, Simeon, and the Wise Men. She knew she was favored and blessed (Luke 1:28). And she knew she would experience great sorrow over Him (Luke 2:25-38).

Mary did worry over Jesus when He disappeared at the Temple (Luke 2:42-50). But we mostly picture her peacefully pondering everything in her heart and even encouraging the first miracle that brought Him malicious attention.

Mary knew. Mary grieved. But, even in her concern for her son, she did not resist God’s plan for His Son. From the time she said, “Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word (Luke 1:48, ESV),” she understood.

Mary knew the worst she could imagine would one day come. But she understood that God was with her. In trusting Him and His plan, she would have the strength to face the unimaginable.

The futility of anxious thinking.

You can’t allay fear with assurances that bad stuff won’t happen. You can’t reframe a tragedy with false promises. It’s not only false, but it’s also unprofitable. When God says don’t worry or be anxious, He doesn’t promise sunshine or even happiness. What does He promise? Provision and peace.

He promises to provide for us, even when life is crummy. When we’re broke or broken, without work or working too hard, grieving an unexpected loss, or sitting with a prognosis that doesn’t look good—worry and anxiety come to visit with it all.

My friend’s beloved son of her heart made it home to her. Her worries were realized, but not in the worst way. She’s rejoicing, but she’s bruised. Another friend’s son unexpectedly went to his final home this week. She hadn’t been worried, but the worst happened anyway, without anticipation. She does have some rejoicing, because he knew Jesus. In all of these, we grieve, and we feel all the feels that go along with it.

Jesus said nothing could be gained by being anxious about it. Not food, not drink, not health, not clothing, and not life itself. Nothing. We can only seek God’s Kingdom, and trust Him to provide.

Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?

But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

Matthew 6:25-27, 33

God’s peace—the opposite of anxious thinking.

He promises that His peace will guard your heart and your mind in Christ Jesus. He quiets the cacophony of anxious thoughts and lines them up in order. It doesn’t always make sense, but you have peace.

Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:4-6 (ESV)

Not only that, but when we dwell on God’s Word, what He’s taught us and shown us—God Himself, the author of our peace, is with us. Our hearts may be troubled, but He’s there. With His peace.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.

Philippians 4:7-8

Are worry and anxiety different?

If you read the verses above in different translations, you’ll see the words worry and anxiety interchangeably. But in today’s vernacular, the two words seem very different.

Here’s my take. Worry seems like a very human and natural anticipation of grief or suffering. Anxiety is a biological reaction to worry. Worry is a thought. Anxiety is our body’s reaction to that thought. I’m open to input on this.

If we’re in a good rhythm of the seeking, thanking, praying, and dwelling God prescribes, we may have the spiritual power to overcome that inclination to worry and barely miss a beat. It may never become anxiety, but even anxious thoughts can be overcome with prayer.

Even in horrible circumstances, we can rest in the kind of peace that passes understanding.

Do we need help with anxiety?

But sometimes anxiety takes over.

When I lost my husband, anxiety disrupted my rhythm with God and with life—it overwhelmed everything I knew to do. And it persisted. Even the simplest of daily activities seemed impossible. I had an amazing network of friends around me, caring for me. But left alone? I just couldn’t.

I sought God, but I couldn’t always see Him. I did see His provision and I gave thanks, but I couldn’t wrap my mind around what I needed, let alone make my requests known to Him. I read aloud the prayers that people sent me or agreed silently when they prayed with me, but forming my own prayer was beyond my ability. My body reacted to my trauma with eye twitches and a lack of concentration—dwelling in the Word wasn’t happening consistently either.

I did what I could, but I knew I needed help. I talked to my doctor. I consulted friends who were counselors, and they guided me to a godly counselor who was right for me. She helped me get back into rhythm. And in that rhythm, I could seek God.

If you recognize a disruption like this, please ask for help. God can work through your doctor, a friend, or a counselor. If you find yourself ready to give up, there’s even a hotline number you can call: 988—you dial it just like you would 911.

It’s okay to need help.

Getting help isn’t something you do instead of turning to God. Sometimes you need help just to make the turn.

Getting help isn’t something you do
instead of turning to God.
Sometimes you need help
just to make the turn.

crg

Here’s the deal, though, sometimes anxiety disrupts so deeply, a person can’t eat, get dressed, or even hold a toothbrush. Recognizing the need and asking for help may be more than they can manage.

In those cases, a friend who is willing to ask, “Are you okay?” or say, “Can I help you find help?” can be a Godsend.

A friend, sent by God. That’s help.

Come Alongside

This seems all over the place, doesn’t it? I tend to blog about what’s on my mind, and this was it today. The stories have a lot of worry and anxiety in them, but really, they’re about peace.

If I could give you anything as you anticipate 2023, it would be peace. If I could give you anything as you look back in remembrance over 2022, it would be peace. But I can’t give you peace. Only our Father God can do that.

I can pray. I can share my journey. And I can nudge you toward seeking, praying, giving thanks, and dwelling. And asking for help. I know you’ll do the same for me. Because you have.

May I pray for you as you make your requests known to God? Message me, or if you’re comfortable, share a prayer or request in the comments.

Traveling in Grace,

Christi